Worship - what we politicians require from you...

Respect - pah! Not good enough, not nearly good enough. We don't provide such fine leadership, such dynamic and creative direction for the masses, for mere 'respect'. Vladimir has shown the way for politicians everywhere - worship is what we require of you:

Vladimir Putin has become the object of veneration for a bizarre all-female sect whose followers believe that the Russian prime minister is a reincarnation of the early Christian missionary Paul the Apostle.

Members of the sect in a village 250 miles south-east of Moscow believe that the 58-year-old former KGB agent is on a mission from God. "According to the Bible, Paul the Apostle was a military commander at first and an evil persecutor of Christians before he started spreading the Christian gospel," the sect's founder, who styles herself Mother Fotina, said.

"In his days in the KGB, Putin also did some rather unrighteous things. But once he became president, he was imbued with the Holy Spirit, and just like the apostle, he started wisely leading his flock."

We are, of course, available for the curing of scrofula and other laying on of hands - plus the receiving of due reverence and sacrifice (preferably in the form of hard cash).

Get worshipping my people.

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