Alan Johnson the chirpy cockney lefty pundit who used to be a health minister under Tony Blair wants to ban Coca-Cola:
One thing: a single proclamation; a dictat that required no pandering to public opinion or consultation with a focus group. It’s simple. I’d ban Coca-Cola and all its offshoots, lookalikes and variants.
Free from the constraints of good sense, this blokiest of ex-MPs reveals himself as just another health fascist. And it helps that Coca-Cola is a faceless American corporation, one of the dark and sinister groups manipulating our gullibility and corrupting our youth. Now I think Coca-Cola is revolting stuff but millions every day enjoy the pleasure of drinking the foul muck and it's none of my business to be calling for bans or anything of that sort.
Fizzy-pop isn't especially good for us but then neither is that lovely chocolate fudge cake Alan's auntie probably used to make or those wonderful hand-made traditional sweets sold in that lovely old-fashioned shop on the high street. Sweetness - whether from sugar, fruit or honey - is wonderful, a joyful pleasure for young and old alike. Johnson, like all the rest of the health fascists, would have us live in a dull, drab world where nannying doctors dictate where, what and when we all eat. A world where little brainwashed kids - in Johnson's words - lecture us about our sins:
The result will be an army of happy children marching forward together, eyes bright, teeth gleaming; instead of teaching the world to sing, they will teach it to stop consuming sugar.
If anything should be banned, we should start with ghastly, self-righteous health facsists like Alan Johnson.
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1 comment:
Many people say that they're sick of people who've parachuted into parliament through the well-trodden Oxbridge PPE route and they'd like MPs with experience of Real Jobs.
I'd make an exception in the case of Johnson, small in stature as well as intellect. That this odious little man would care to deny some pleasure to people who drink Coca-Cola says all you need to know.
I suppose the next thing on his agenda is to ban big, virile bodyguards.
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