Thursday, 10 January 2019

The Cheese Toastie - gateway drug to motorcycle gangsterism

I am grateful that Bristol Council is on the case - what would we do without such folk:
Cheese toasties have been banned from sale in a Bristol park amid fears a proposed hot food van could attract booze-fuelled antisocial behaviour and motorbike gangs.
Where would we be without the sort of councillor brave enough to face up to the Dark Evil of the Toastie. The nation would be riddled with booze-fuelled motor-cyclists and other ne'er-do-wells. Here is our heroic councillor Claire Hiscott:
“It’s right next to Orchard School, which is a challenging school that sometimes has a problem with keeping kids in school. They have to have patrols of staff to make sure kids don’t walk off site. The lure of a food concession may encourage kids to take a little walk. The school has made a lot of effort to encourage healthy eating. We have problems with childhood obesity. Historically we had antisocial behaviour, not just motorbikes, from young adults gathering with alcohol and causing a disturbance."
What a load of nonsense and typical of the attitude of too many councillors (and a fair few local residents) to young people. Do they really think that having a van selling cheese toasties is going to turn sweet innocent school kids into obese, booze-crazed motor cycle gangsters?



Attacker of the Killjoy said...

If they're obese, they can't run. Also, I suggest a committee on the merits of the cheese toastie van. If he's good, give him the licence. ;-)

There are things deeply wrong with this country. I suggest we suspend our elections post-Brexit and have a meritocracy sort out the mess. We need a great growth. We need that cheese toastie van, basically.

Manx Gent said...

Reminds me of that John Cooper-Clarke poem, Cycle Sluts, which ends with the immortal words "For you that's how the world will end/not with a bang but a Wimpy".
Seriously though, have these buffoons met many bikers? I can confirm that the average TT visitor here ranges from decent working class lads in skilled jobs (e.g. engineering, IT) through to older blokes retired early after running successful businesses and enjoying themselves. Might like the odd chip supper but the island's best restaurants are fuller with folk who know their food than any other time of the year too.
Where are the negative role models in folk like that?