"What they feed you in Heaven"

The gods have got their communications wrong with all this talk of nectar and ambrosia. I mean how did sweet syrup and rice pudding get to be the acme of grub? Those gods are kidding us - the truth about the food of the gods, the nosh they give you in heaven, is that it involves two vital ingredients - bacon and mushrooms. And today, in an exclusive, The View from Cullingworth reveals what we'll feast on as we lounge on that cloud:

Mushrooms wrapped in Bacon with Rosemary

This truly is "What they feed you in Heaven" - and earth-dwellers, I shall exclusively reveal the recipe (that I've lifted from Shaina Olmanson via The Mushroom Channel).

You'll need:

12 button mushrooms
A handful of rosemary sprigs
4 fl oz apple cider vinegar (or white wine vinegar or sherry)
½ teaspoon salt
3 tablespoons olive oil
6 strips of thin bacon, sliced in half

You start by making a marinade by crushing some of the rosemary in  pestle and then mixing it with the vinegar and salt before whisking in the oil. Put the mushrooms in this marinade for at least 20 minutes so the flavours of vinegar and rosemary soak in a little.

Cut the bacon into strips long enough to wrap round a single mushroom (I found this to be about 3 inches in English money). And then you just wrap the bacon round each mushroom and a sprig of rosemary then secure it all in place with a cocktail stick. Place the wondrous things onto a baking tray, drizzle a little of the marinade over the top and pop in the oven at 200 degrees for about 15 minutes to 18 minutes.

Remove from the oven, place onto a silver platter, put your golden harp to one side, lean back on your cloud and enjoy "What they feed you in Heaven".

Perhaps with a glass of fizz?

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Run rabbit, run rabbit, run, run, run...

Baked Pasta with Rabbit

Run rabbit – run rabbit – Run! Run! Run!

Don't give the farmer his fun! Fun! Fun!

He'll get by

Without his rabbit pie

So run rabbit – run rabbit – Run! Run! Run

 

The conversation goes a little like this....

“Why don’t people eat more rabbit? It’s not like there’s a shortage of bunnies?”

“Three reasons – eww, how could you, bunnies are cute; never tried rabbit, so will stick to nice safe steak; and ‘oh, it’s so cruel to shoot and eat wild animals.”

(There’s a fourth reason if you’re Jewish – rabbit isn’t kosher).

Now I like rabbit – it’s lean, full of flavour and carries a sauce very well. Plus it’s usually pretty cheap – posh rabbits from Bolton Abbey estate are £4.50 in Cullingworth’s butcher and I’d lay a bet that you can get them cheaper than that in Bradford’s John Street Market.

Plus, of course, if you can shoot and have a landowner’s permission, you can go and get your own!

So there you are, dead bunny in hand (skinned and cleaned by a helpful butcher in our case) – what to make? Pies and stews are the classics but, for a change, try doing it Italian-style.

Lorenza De’Medici published a book on pasta and accompanying sauces including several recipes for rabbit and I’ve stolen the approach from her (although the actual recipe is not the same).

Baked Pasta with Rabbit (to feed six - or four greedy folk)

One rabbit (cut into sections)

Two medium onions roughly chopped

Three or four good sized carrots thickly sliced

Two good sized sprigs of sage

Large glass of red wine

Pennoni rigati (about 300g)

Pint of white sauce

Couple of fresh tomatoes

Salt

Black pepper

Olive oil

Heat the oil and brown the rabbit pieces and soften the onions and carrots then transfer to a roasting tray. Roughly chop the sage over the rabbit and vegetables and pour the red wine over the top. Cover tightly with foil and slow roast for about 3 hours at 100° (we want the rabbit to fall off the bones easily without being too dry – it’s worth checking after a couple of hours).

Strip the rabbit meat from the skeleton – you want it to be quite finely shredded so pull apart the meat as you take it off the bones. Mix the meat back into the vegetables and set aside.

Cook the pasta for half its recommended time (typically about 5 minutes in salted boiling water), drain and mix thoroughly with the meat and vegetables. Turn this mixture into an over proof dish.

Make the white sauce and pour it over the top of the rabbit and pasta mixture. Decorate with slices of tomato and bake for 35-40 minutes at 200° (180° in a fan oven). You’ll know it’s done when the top has begun to brown a little and is bubbling.

Lovely!

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Mutton curry - an authentic South London recipe!

Ok, it’s my recipe and I’m from South London. That’s authentic!

Mutton curry is, without doubt, one of the finest dishes on the planet. Whether we’re talking Caribbean, Kashmiri or indeed Penge.

The secret for me is in the time you take to make the curry rather than the precise contents. And it takes a long time – nearly as long as it take to make a good oxtail stew!

You start – as one does – with a couple of pounds of mutton on the bone (I get it hacked up by the halal butcher), some onions and some garlic. And mix them all together with enough curry power, salt, ground ginger and cumin to coat all the mutton – add some oil so it all stays stuck and marinades well. I sometimes add a dash or three of vinegar (if I remember).

Leave to stand for absolutely ages – at least 24 hours and ideally 48 hours in the fridge marinading. The mutton should look almost cooked at this point (it isn’t it just looks that way). Heat up some oil in a heavy pan or casserole and seal the meat – add some other vegetables such as celery, okra or turnip and cover with water. Bring to the boil and then put into the over – preheated to somewhere between 100 and 150 degrees. Cook for at least 4 hours – the bones should come off the meat cleanly.

Serve with plain boiled rice (or naan or chapatti – whatever takes your fancy) and a pint of lager.

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